Bad Day

Today was a bad day, truly horrific and it’s barely noon (now 1pm) here! I didn’t sleep last night, nor did Kanin.  He woke me up in an extremely rude way and has just been an all around defiant turd. Anyone who has or had a four-year old, know the struggle is real! Add that his dad is currently three states away and you have a volatile cocktail.  Apparently today is an off day for him. It happens to the best of us, can’t expect it not to happen to a little boy.

I messaged a few girlfriends and asked point-blank if any of their kids were being terrorists today. One replied, “I put them on a big yellow bus for underpaid strangers to endure”. That was classic. I truly laughed out loud and felt better. A few more lines of dialog passed, I said I wanted a padded room to myself. Again I got the perfect answer, “I support you in that decision. You can tell the police it was a matter of national security”.  They’re parents, they 100% understand that some days your kids are assholes. They didn’t pass judgment, they didn’t tell me I was being a bad mom for calling him a terrorist. They supported my need for solidarity. We as women… no as moms need those type of people in our lives. People who will take you at your worst and your best. Who will stand next to you and say, “Yeah, kids are assholes”. Maybe not in those words, but they understand. As a mom, especially a stay at home mom (or dad) you have good days, bad days and some days that you honestly couldn’t tell another living soul what occurred. These women are it for me and I couldn’t ask for a better support group. Anne, Stacy, Kaitlin, Sarah and our new addition, Carrie, thank you for being those people for me. Thank you for enduring our weird friendships that have been forged through child loss. I hope that no matter what, we’ll always stay friends.

My sister, Jenn is another true friend for me. Although we may have blood in common, we also have  a friendship. Not every sibling does and I’m thankful we do. I’m glad we can vent to each other about politics, our kids being frozen piles of feces to be thrown by monkeys and our own life struggles. Again, no judgement, just acceptance and some advice thrown in. We talked for three hours yesterday on all sorts of topics and it was great to have adult conversation. So, thank you Jenn for being the best big sister a girl could ask for.

Even though today has been a bad day so far, I have friends and family of the best sort. Kanin is currently napping… first time in a week! And I’m sitting here drinking chia tea, listening to music and relaxing. Getting ready for the storm that is my child who will inevitably wake up and want to play some outrageous game. Funny, I started this post as a way to vent about my crappy parenting and how much I’m struggling as a mom today. Yet it turned into praise and thankfulness to amazing women in my life. It just goes to show you, you cannot judge the future by the past.  Love all you girls!


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